Although the end of a relationship may feel like it – it is not ‘The End’. There is hope for a new life. That’s why I called my book, ‘New Life in the Mourning – hope when the relationship ends’. I believe there is life, a good life after the end of a relationship. It may not be the happily ever after dream you pictured, but you can heal and move forward and choose life. Part of moving forward at the end of a relationship is to believe and plan for the future, knowing you can have a good life and make daily choices on how you live.

You can waste much of your time and energy either lamenting the past or worrying about the future. Or you can choose to live one day at a time believing each day is a fresh start and a chance to begin again.

You can choose your attitude for any given day. To be patient and loving, to strive to do your best and not live out of fear for a day. You can choose to let go of negative emotions and forgive your failings and the failings of others just for the day. When the day is done, you can put it to rest and begin afresh the next day. Your lifetime is built on the choices you make as you live one day at a time.

You can choose an abundant life. An abundant life is not about what you have, but who you are and how you live. It’s not about success or prosperity; it’s about character and what you are giving of ourselves. Living a full life and fulfilling your purpose may bring success in worldly terms but abundance itself is not about things. It’s finding joy despite your circumstances. You can choose to share in this abundant life.

Some stepping stones to choosing life are:

  • Changing your perspective: the negative emotions at the end of a relationship, your thoughts and your circumstances can sway your outlook to the negative.
  • Live one day at a time: You can waste much of your time lamenting the past or worrying about the future. Focus on today. Forgiveness is the key to letting go of the past.
  • Live creatively: New life can be found in rediscovering your creativity.
  • Practise health: Choosing life is pursuing health physically, spiritually, mentally, emotionally and relationally. You need to be involved and responsible for your own health. Health is defined as ‘fulfilling your potential’ so pursuing your purpose and achieving your dream are intertwined with your health.